Respect comes before love

"Respect comes before love." - words heard from my beloved husband from the times when we were just in the beginning of our friendship. 

A relationship may take decades to build up but it takes only a few minutes to break it up. Such is the hurt of a man or woman relationship that need caring and look after every day. These are significant and important tips to save your relationship.

It is a tender seedling when you meet each other, which needs nourishment from both the partners as it grows.The hard truth perhaps is that mostly you land up giving more that you take. Thus a break up advice is difficult to provide, as the reason for the break up is an important issue to be tackled first, and the key to this secret door rests with the individuals in the couple. But break up advice for people who want to save their relationship is more comfortable to provide. 

Here are some universal thoughts on the subject:

• Learn to accept reality and move on: If you have harbored a particular type of perfect dream of your relationship, perhaps you would be one of the firsts to get disappointed. However strongly you may feel when you meet your partner, remember, things may not be the way you 'dreamed' it to be.

There is no fairy tale magic which happens in earthly relationships which is more bumps than walks in the Garden of Eden on moonlit nights. To make any relationship work, it takes two to put in their efforts. You need to communicate to your partner about extending a bit more to make both hands clap. Learn to accept your partner's personality, attitudes and habits and never to correct too many things at the same time. Remember, we are what we are. Any change forced on us would make any one resent.

• Inject humor in your life: Laughter is the best medicine they say. It is not just a medicine but a daily necessity to make anyone tick. Any relationship can thrive if even one has a good sense of humor. Cultivate the habit of laughing at yourself and watch the ease and comfort increase in your relationship. Many times when there is no laughter in the house, try to walk that extra mile, to inject humor from external sources like getting humorous friends over, watching funny movies together, etc.

• Respect and trust comes before love: While love may trigger a relationship but it is respect and trust which make it last. Admire some quality in your partner and encourage him or her to culture this more. Respect your partner for what he or she is and not because you have made him or her according to your wishes. Respecting your partners' choices and preferences is also important. Trust can not develop overnight and inculcate this quality and regard its importance in a relationship.

• Change your perspective: It is selfish to view everything from your own point of view. Learn to be compassionate and look at things from your partner's perspective. You would be surprised at what you find.

Capacity to give and forgive is one of the best ingredients which can make a relationship get stronger. So the best piece of breakup advice one can give to couples who wish to save their relationship is this: Get into your partner's shoes and see the problem. You would know exactly what to do to save the relationship.