The rules of my Father

The rules of my Father when a guy asked him and Mama to allow to date me... The guy was second year in college and me I was in the fourth year of high school and he was doing his research studies in the department of my father. So my TATA took this guy to a short meeting...

Rule NO. 1:

If you come by car to our home and  you start to honk, you better bring something with you ... anything. Because from here, sure you'll leave with nothing. 

Rule NO. 2: 

Do not touch my daughter in my presence. You can look in a shy way to her and quick, as long your eyes are not looking to anything below the neck. If you can not keep your eyes and hands away from my daughter, I will remove them from your body. 

Rule NO. 3:

I realize that is considered \ "cool \" for boys in your age to wear pants that fall wide on them. Please do not take as an insult, but you and your friends look like idiots dressed like this. However, I want to be open mind about this subject, so I propose you a compromise: you can come by the front door with your underwear able to be seen and your pants larger with 10 numbers, I will not object. However, to make sure that your clothes do not fall on you, I will connect your pants with an electrical cable around your waist.   

Rule NO. 4:

I'm sure you heard that these days unprotected sex, can kill you. Let me enter more in details and tell you that sex can kill with protection too. In this case, if it comes to sex, I'm the protection. 

Rule NO. 5:

It is understandable that to know each better, usually we could talk about sports, politics and other topics of the day. Please do not do it! The only information I need from you is an indication of the time you will bring back my daughter and the only word I need from you is \ "early \". 

Rule NO. 6:

I have no doubt that you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. It is OK for me if it is ok with my daughter too. On the other hand, once you date my little daughter, you will continue to date JUST her until she will be sick of you. If you make her cry, I'll make you cry too.   

Rule NO. 7:

While you stand in the hallway and expect my daughter to come, even if it take more than one hour, I don't want to see you bored or nervous. If you want to reach in time for the movie you should quit dating. My daughter needs time to makeup, a process that may take longer than painting a bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don' t you do something useful, like taking the garbage out?

Rule NO. 8:

The following places are not suitable for my daughter: Places where are beds, sofas or anything softer than a wooden chair. Places where parents are not present, police or any other authority figures. Dark Places. Places where people dance, people feel good and hold hands. Places where the temperature is high enough that it makes my daughter to wear shorts, short skirts, T- shirts or anything else than sweaters, blouses with long neck and pants. Films with romantic or sexual strong theme are forbidden. Films that present violence or where it appears at least a saw are ok. Football matches or hockey are ok. Our house is even better!

Rule NO. 9:

Do not lie to me. When it comes about my daughter, I'm all-knowing, the merciless god of the universe. If I ask where you go and with whom, you have only one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel and 24 acres of land in the country, which includes 3 acres of forest. Do not play with me!!!

Rule NO. 10:

Be afraid! Be very afraid!!! It's very easy for me to feel like the sound of your car's engine in the alley is the one of plain war. When this happens, the voices in my head tell me in an obsessive way to clean my guns while I wait you to bring my daughter at home. Once you get in front of the house, you get out of the car with both hands on your head. You say the password and announce that you brought my daughter at home safely and earlier than we discussed, then go back in the car and leave (there is no reason you enter the house). The figure camouflaged from the window is mine.

Of course after this "meeting", there was NO DATE :))))))))))))))))))). I found out after years that this guy married with a colleague of mine from high school and they have a daughter ^___^. Good for them and good for me too, because I was already promised by destiny to my Egyptian prince ^___^  ^____^.